Don’t Change your Job …. Change YOURSELF !

3 weeks back , I got a call from an unknown number late eve, when I had almost packed my bag and was about to leave my office, the voice on the other side was of a senior executive from an MNC. The gentlemen requested me to listen to him for 5 minutes patiently.

Though I had switched off the office lights , but I decided to sit back and listen to him .

He  mentioned that he has taken up a new job  after working in a company for 5 years. It’s a cultural fit, he loves his team , and he is proud of the work he is doing there.

Its high-prestige position  and he is one of the senior member of the leadership team .

In many ways , it’s a dream job and its just a couple of months that he is into it.

When I enquired him the reason of the call , he broke out that he is feeling very depressed and disheartened .

I asked him ‘Why’  - and he told me that his work-life is completely imbalanced and most importantly his boss is not giving him enough time to set him up in the role and on the other hand his teammates are not listening to him .

After spending 60-70 hours per week and working all day , having hardly anytime left to take 2 times meal , his tasks were just piling up and he is missing important timelines .

After listening to him for about another 5 minutes – I told him that he just need some more time to adjust!

But he didn’t stop there , he mentioned that day by day his relationship with his boss and his teammates is going from bad to worse .

During  weekly meetings with his boss, he feels at loss of words to express his views and comes back with all the instructions & new timelines to finish the assignments.

On the other hand , his teammates are not in his control – they are taking their own time and means to complete their assigned task, which is causing not only  delay in projects but the quality is also suffering.

Finally he mentioned to me – “Arun – I physically and mentally cannot continue to work like this . Can you please , help me to find a new Job? , ”

And my response was – NO

I love to work with people and I told him that before looking for a job outside , first he must conquer the current situation by building trust and best of relationship with his boss & teammates and prove that what he is worth for.

As he knew that I am a certified coach from International Coaching Federation (ICF), we quickly set up a call on the weekend for a powerful coaching session on improving relationships at work .

Post the coaching session , he realized that what he was lacking and how he was responding to the situations around him, and later post second coaching session , he was looking more confident and in control of his situation in a very short period of time.

Conclusion : Solutions to our problems lies within us , but we tend to blame our situations and people around us .

Are you in a similar situation , wherein your relationship with your boss is not moving ahead or you are at loss of words during crucial conversations with your manager.

There is a secret to make any relationship work. As you want to work on developing healthy and long lasting relationship , I can coach you to raise your awareness to develop understanding and flexibility  in by developing different perspectives.


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